1992 Grand Prix, 1994 Cutlass, 1991 Grand Prix

[SappySE107]

Yeah, same time zone. Cool

[95SleeperAcheiva]

SO....Went to go pick up the Cutlass, she was really dirty! :P Looked like she's been sitting for a long time. Tried jump starting her but the battery wouldn't take a charge so I broke down, went to O'rielly's, swapped in my account number there, and bought a battery. Once installed she fired up without a hitch. She did the dry valvetrain cackle and then started to smooth out. Doors stick a little, some flat spots in the tires from sitting, rotors cleaned themselves up in a few miles, I noticed the camber being off in the rear tires, so she needs an alignment, and of course, no a/c and they had a "heat watch" going on with temps of 101 degrees! I just wanted to state, this is the BEST $500 car I have ever purchased!
I stopped and got her washed before hitting the road, thanks for the full tank of gas too BTW. Once I let her shake herself down a few miles I got an opportunity to punch her......nice pull. She's smooth, comfortable, very responsive.

Had no problems all the way home, even did decent on gas.....then when I was getting closer to home my buddy and I started hot footing it a bit, it was that or fall asleep. Well I went from good gas mileage to vapors pretty quick. Typical of the DOHC, you put you foot in it and she drinks deep. Not complaining.
We broke off, him living a few exits before me and I went home. Stopped and filled up again, then putted the last 2 blocks to home. I notice a traffic jam, I go up into the side streets by my house only 2 blocks to go, I pass Officer Shithead in the sidestreet going opposite direction. He proceeds to turn around, I stop, signal, and turn towards my street, I make next stop sign by time Officer F*cknut catches up. I go tto next stop sign, last one before my house, I can see my house, 2 houses away, less then 300 feet, Officer Cocksucker turns on his lights.

This is getting old.

"license and registration pls."
"Yes sir officer, please note the seat belt is on."
"hmm"
Pass him license and signed title. "I jsut bought the car, I'm on my way home, been a long trip."
"Why are you in these side streets?" (1. Didn't I just tell him that? 2. Last I checked this is fucking america and I'm american, I can't go up a side street?)
"I live right there, I just bought the car, I'm on my way home from a long trip, where I bought the car." I point at my house where my wife and kids are now watching daddy getting pulled over. "May I ask why I'm being stopped?"
"You failed to signal your turn." (OK I call BULLSHIT! Who here...Any of you...would be dumbb enough to pass a cop, notice the asshole turning around to fuck with you, and NOT use your signal!?)
"Officer, I used my signal." ( because I saw you turn around you asshole, I knew damn well your out here to make revenue, the only thing your doing "serving and protecting" is the treasury of Parma!)
"No you didn't, I could show you the tape." (at this point I'm thinking, ya show me the tape asshole, because you weren't even behind me yet! But, if I give this guy a hard time he's just going to harass me further, so lets play his game.)
"I know they work, I checked them all before i left indiana."
He points his flash light to the idiot lights on the dash, 4 are lit. "Well you have alot of lights on there, looks like not much works on this car." (OH you wanna go there? Really? Officer shithead wants to go toe-to-toe with a mechanic? LOL cool, I can put you down on that. Let's go over the lights in question.) I point at the brake light....
"Sensor in the master cylinder, operates off a float to tell you when the fluid is low, float is sunk, brakes work fine. ABS light, last I checked, optional equipment, not requires by law. Airbag light, again not required by law and thankfully don't work. Low coolant light, bad sensor, not required by law to have full coolant in my car."
"Lets check the brakes. Put on your e-brake." This is how this guy checks the brakes? I put on the e-brake. He doesn't like how far I pushed the petal, apparently NOT far enough.
"Thats it, that's as far as it goes, any harder would be pointless."
"Put it in gear" I do "put it in drive" I do "give it some gas" (I almost stood on it and burned the tires, I had to fight the urge, I goosed it) I cutlass stayed put, good girl.
"The ebrake barely works." ( the car didn't move, we never looked at the system itself, how the fuck you figure?!) Then he proceeds to check all my lights. I had one marker light out up front. I have to check some laws, but I believe it's not ticketable.
Geuss what? The turn signal worked, so he then claimed I didn't use it. And they wonder why people hate them.

He ticketed me for a turn signal anyway.

I get home, I go for a walk to see the traffic jam, I have suspicions......
Ya, that's what I thought, DUI check point on main street.
So Offcier shithead is supposed to be out catching drunk drivers, so instead to make his quota he gives me a ticket for what-ever he can get away with. he knows damn well I'm driving a 14 year old car so don't have the money to hire a lawyer and fight a cheap ticket. This si the kind of shit that makes me freaking livid.

How does this fuckhead live with himself?
How do any of you shithead traffic cops sleep at night?

You better hope I don't get a butt load of money one day. I'll put the system down, 1 city at a time if I have too. And if you really keep pissing me off, I'll take office, fire half of you, and change all the damn laws so you stop raping the people.

[robertisaar]

really long-term update:

Ben, is your dad missing an allen wrench? really small size, noticed it a few weeks after picking up the 91, couldn't figure out where an extra allen wrench came from and then it dawned on me that the shift knob needed pulled to remove the console in the 92.

???